How to get from Problem to SOLUTION!

It is my belief that every problem has a solution.

Hate your job?? QUIT!

Don't like your hair?? GET IT CUT!

Not happy with your weight?? EAT LESS AND EXERCISE!

Mad at your spouse?? TELL THEM!

Need more help cleaning house?? ASK FOR IT!

Sounds simple, eh?

Believe me when I say... I know it's not.

And the reason why it's not this simple is becasue of our struggle to change. And as I've written in a previous article: it's not the actual change we fear, but what we are leaving behind. Our resistance to this loss is what can sometimes slow down our process- or even cripple it.

I can help you recognize, understand, and move past your resistance

so that any problem you face will have a solution!

How Can You Recover From An Affair?

This is a very tough question. One whose solution is as complex as the emotional impact on both partners.

Disclosing the truth of an infidelity to your partner can be a very difficult and painful experience- for both. The cheater may feel overwhelming guilt, sadness, and confusion while the cheated may feel insurmountable anger, betrayal, and hurt.

If you are in a marriage or relationship that is of value to you and you are willing to do what it takes to make amends and repair the damage done, I believe there is hope.

Healing a relationship broken by infidelity involves the cheater taking responsibility and accountability for the affair and both partners opening up about the issues in their marriage before and after the affair. A highly emotional and often painful process is often necessary to rebuild trust.

I can teach you the communication skills that are vital to reconciliation.

If you want to repair your relationship, please contact me.

I can help.

Thank You

As a caring professional and dedicated businesswoman, I strive to serve my patients with the utmost care, compassion, professionalism, and clinical knowledge. This is a promise I make each and every session.

I truly appreciate my patients' willingness to treat me and my practice with the same respect. By showing up for scheduled appointments and cooperating with my cancellation and rescheduling policies, my patients prove their dedication to their own growth and improvement as well as respecting my business as my livelihood.

I'd like to thank you all for turning my passion into a success!

Sincerely,

Karen Ray Israel, M.Ed., LPC, BCPC

A LITTLE MOTIVATION... CLICK PLAY!

When Should You Seek Therapy?

Many of you reading this blog may ask yourself: when is the right time for therapy? And this is a good question with an easy answer.

Seek therapy when your way no longer works.

Have the courage to change.

This is certainly no judgement of you, but rather a realistic look at your coping and problem solving skills and whether or not they serve your purpose. You learn, over the course of time and through experiences, how to deal with certain situations should they arise again. But as you mature and change, and your problems mature and change, so must your solutions. Unfortunately, sometimes you just don't know how or where to find the new solution.

Cue Therapist!

Remember- there is courage and strength in asking for help and taking responsibility for your mistakes. There is opportunity and fortune in correcting them.

P.S. As I wrote in a previous post about when to seek Marriage Counseling, the same applies here:

DON'T WAIT UNTIL IT'S TOO LATE!

I'm Moving Into a New Office!

Hello!

I'm proud and excited to inform you that I am moving into a new office!

The new location is at Frankford and Preston Rd.; a mere 2 miles from the Plano Parkway location. I will be seeing all clients at that location starting March 3, 2008.

My new address is:
17760 Preston Rd.
Dallas, Texas 75252

My building is in the right-hand corner of the second circle in Georgetown Office Park, located just south-east of the intersection of Preston Rd. and Frankford.

For simple entry from southbound Preston Rd., there is a left turn-in lane, just south of the Taco Bueno, that leads into the office park. There are 2 entrances from northbound Preston Rd. into the office park.
My office is on the first floor and you may make yourself comfortable in the reception entrance until I greet you to start our session.

Click this link for exact directions.

Thank you for choosing me as your therapist and I look forward to our continued work together!

Karen Ray Israel, M.Ed., LPC, BCPC
Psychotherapist
Board Certified Professional Counselor
972-567-5000

Choose Happiness

We are now in the month of Pisces, also known as the month of Joy. Happiness is upon us. Do you feel it?

If you have been on the road of self- improvement for any amount of time, you know that happiness isn't something that just appears or disappears. It's something you have to create.

Happiness can actually be one of the most reactive emotions because we tend to spend our lives waiting for things to happen that will make us happy: I'll be happy when I get promoted, when I have a boyfriend, when I lose the weight. This is such a flawed belief system.

Waiting for any external force to awaken our joy and happiness is precisely what keeps us lacking in joy and happiness. Happiness is a choice we make and must continue to make repeatedly.

But what do you do when the conditions of your life aren't exactly joyful? Experts recommend faking it till you make it. In other words, if you can't find the strength within, awaken it from without.

Let's remember that it's our five senses that prevent us from seeing the Light in every situation or, in other words, from being happy 100% of the time. Studies have shown that if someone describes a scene to you and you imagine it, whether or not you see it with your eyes, the same areas of your brain are stimulated. The brain doesn't care whether it happens in reality or not.

Similarly, when you smile, it doesn't matter if something is making you smile or if you're just smiling for no good reason - the result is the same. When the muscles in your face contract, endorphins are released into your blood stream, giving you that good feeling. Whether or not the smile is caused by the sight of your lover or because you're holding a pen in your mouth like a bone (try it out for yourself), the body perceives that you are smiling, and it does its part.

Remember, practice makes perfect. The more you put yourself in the mood, the quicker you'll be in the mood. This week is about making the decision that you are not going to allow problems to interfere with your happiness. After all, this is the month of happiness and joy.

So, make it happen!

*Excerpts taken from Weekly Kabbalah Tune-up from Yehuda Berg

Trauma Recovery Sessions

Have you endured serious traumas in your past

which have changed or altered you in the present?

Would you like to process through these experiences

and finally learn how to leave them in the past?

Would you like to live a happy life based on

YOUR rules and wishes versus the injuries

your perpetrators left you with?

If your answer is YES to any of these questions

or if you've even wondered what it might be like to

break free of your painful past, then This Program Is For You.

I am launching bi-weekly Trauma Recovery Sessions for adult individuals wanting to recover from:
Sexual Abuse
Physical Abuse
Emotional/Verbal/Mental Abuse
PTSD/War Trauma

My focus is to help you face the harmful physical and emotional memories and impacts of your trauma with POWER.
Your goal is to emerge a happier and more well-adjusted person free to live your life as you choose.

Sessions will be held every Monday and Thursday, will last 50 minutes each. Please contact me at 972-567-5000 for fee information and to schedule your appointments.

Managed Care: A Personal Balancing Act

I find that managed care has only created a way for us as consumers, as well as our deserving practitioners, to feel exploited. I'm sure many of you may agree with me.

I have encountered many clients in great need of counseling who feel they must take the managed care route to pay for their therapy. I fully support this, especially when people pay a virtual second mortgage quarterly to be covered for a myriad of possible medical emergencies that may arise. Provided that the insurance companies do what they are supposed to do (file properly and justly and compensate the practitioner and/or patient as well when out-of-network benefits are utilized), everyone ends up happy, patients are well taken care of, and practitioners feel pride for a job well-done and well-appreciated for their expertise.

From personal experience and hearsay from colleagues as well as clients, sadly, this does not always happen. Many of the insurance companies, who seem to have acquired wells full of our money, beat around the proverbial bush, stall their payments, come up with reasons not to approve a patient who truly needs help, and sometimes never pay the practitioner at all.

This leaves patients without appropriate care, upset, and out of money. This also leaves practitioners devoid of their important clientele, bitter, and out of money.

My solution for this is to find a balance with my patients. I am not on any insurance company panels for the reasons I listed above. The heartache and turmoil it causes for all involved is, I believe, easily handled. I offer 2 very feasible options.

I am an out-of network provider. This means that if you have out-of-network benefits, then you can be reimbursed for a portion of my fees. I offer a detailed receipt including all codes and diagnoses potentially needed to approve your treatment. You may send in a copy of the receipt to the insurance company and receive their prompt reimbursement. I have seen this a very successful and more profitable way, for the patient, to deal with managed care.

One other thing I offer is a sliding scale fee schedule for patients with specific financial needs. Sliding scale fee schedule means that the fee is negotiated so as to get the patient the help they need, cut out the middle man, and help all parties feel appreciated and respected.

Just ask me. I'll get you the help you need.

Get Started!

Send me an email and ask the questions

you really want answers to!

I'll tell you exactly how you and I can

work together to fix your problem!

Email me at: karen.israel@gmail.com

New Year Discount!

To all my prospective clients:

For the month of January, I will be offering the initial diagnostic session at weekly session prices - a 20% discount!*

Get started with your New Year's Resolution to

Become Your Best Self!

*Please let me know you've seen this ad to get the discount.

Happy New Year!

Here's wishing you all a Happy New Year

and the opportunity to make it the best year yet!

-KRI

New Year- New Life!

As we near the end of 2007 and the bright beginning of 2008, talk of the New Year's resolution bubbles up.

What gifts will your new year hold?
What relationship will you work on mending?
What dream will you try to bring to reality?
What wrong will you make right?
What opportunity will you take?
What challenge will you face with courage?
What personal quest will you embark upon?

Whatever your New Year's resolution will be,

I can help you find the secret to making it happen!

START NOW!

Make your Choice

Finding the courage to take responsibility for yourself and change your life is one of the greatest human challenges you may face. You have accumulated habits and beliefs that have shaped and continue to shape every single relationship you embark upon. Your experiences, starting in early childhood up to the moment before you read this sentence, have the power to leave lasting impacts. Some of these have been incredible and have changed you for the better… and some have marked you terribly.

I now offer you a choice; and perhaps one you never thought of before. Do you want to stay the way you are, missing vital pieces of happiness? Or do you want to find your inherent control and power that can help you heal from old wounds and persevere?

You do have a choice, and I’d like to help you see it.

Manage Your Anger

Anger is a necessary and important emotion we have that lets us know when something is wrong or we've been violated in some way. However, anger can turn into volatile rage when it's not managed properly.

Do you notice these tendencies in your daily life?

1. Easily irritable
2. Prone to road rage
3. Frequent headaches
4. Frequent stomach aches
5. Difficulty sleeping
6. Others distancing themselves from you when you show your anger
7. Rage attacks- throwing things or hitting things/people/yourself when you get overly angry
8. Blackouts after rage attacks
9. Predominant sarcasm
10. Habitual lateness
11. Procrastination
12. Predominant boredom
13. Depression

These are just a few possible symptoms of suppressed anger that can at least make your life less than content and at most turn into damaging rage.

If you identify with any of these, please call me.

I can help you.

The Secrets to a Good Marriage

Would you like to know the secrets to a GOOD MARRIAGE?
Would you like to know how to maintain emotional intimacy?
Would you like to know how to rekindle sexual flames?
Would you like to know how to really communicate with your partner?
Would you like to know how to teach your partner exactly how to treat you?

These are a few small questions that pack BIG answers for the health and longevity of your relationship.

Call me to set up an appointment- I'll let you in on these secrets!

What is your DREAM?

The counseling process is not just for those who struggle with monumental life issues- it is for everyone and anyone who has a dream they want to fulfill or a focus of desire for a better life.

What is your Desire? What is your Dream?

- A better marriage?
- A better relationship with your children?
- A better work environment?
- Better management of your anger?
- Better management of your grief?
- Recovery from trauma?
- Higher self-esteem?
- More assertiveness and self-respect?
- Resolve old issues?
- Maintain the hard work you've alreayd done?

Whatever your desire, or dream... YOU can achieve it!

I CAN HELP.

Family and The Holidays

When holiday time comes around, we are filled with joy. The anticipation of parties, spending time with friends, giving and receiving gifts, and the general sense of cheerfulness is overwhleming and welcome.

However, for some of us, the holidays are a time when we are faced with old demons, unfinished business, and residual pain. We realize that we are going to be placed in situations that involve our families of origin (mother, father, siblings). We may feel forced, either by feelings of obligation or manipulation, to spend time with people who push our buttons. We can often feel like victims in these situations and forget that we have the power to make the gathering enjoyable regardless of the issues present in our lives.

Family issues can be terribly tricky and confusing. The holidays are a time when we try to make things seem great when sometimes they are just the opposite. We can be easily triggered by old behavioral patterns and fall back into dysfunction.

I'd like to offer some ways to help you enforce your personal boundaries and go into those family gatherings with more self-assuredness, more assertiveness, and be able to leave feeling victorious and whole rather than victimized and disintegrated.

1). Talk about things YOU feel comfortable talking about. Remember that you are an adult and are free to make your own decisions about what you will and won't share.
2). Place yourself near people you trust, enjoy, and feel safe with. If you feel you are being pushed into a corner with someone who triggers your issues, politely excuse yourself to a surrounding that welcomes you.
3). Have an idea of how much time you want to spend with family and let them know that you will be arriving/leaving around those time parameters. Planning ahead will help you feel in control. And making your own decisions known will foster respect from others.
4). Remember that you are an adult and you get to choose if you want to allow someone's words to penetrate you or not. Even when it is difficult, remind yourself that you are there to have a nice time and you don't have to let anyone spoil it for you.
5). Give yourself a pep talk before you leave for the gathering and get support from someone joining you or from someone who you will meet there. Knowing someone is on your side always feels good.
6). Remember to respect yourself and others. Even if you are faced with someone who is toxic for you, get out of the situation and start anew. You will feel better about yourself knowing that you remained honest about your thoughts and feelings while being considerate of yourself and others.
7). You get to decide if you want to be a part of the holiday festivities or not. Use your best judgement. If you think it will be too painful or difficult for you to handle, then make your own holiday plans with people you feel loved and supported by.

Some people in our families of origin are, unfortunately, never going to be safe enough for us to have healthy relationships with. If you think this might be your situation or if you find that you really struggle with family of origin relationships, seeking counseling could help you. Please contact me if you need help.

NEW PHONE NUMBER

I have just gotten a new office phone number.
You may contact me at 972-567-5000.

You may still be able to call the old # and get my voicemail, although
I cannot check messages or return calls from that phone number.

Thanks and I look forward to hearing from you!

Sincerely,
Karen Ray Israel, M.Ed., LPC, BCPC

What To Expect From Counseling... and What Not To

First of all, I'd like to applaud each and every one of you who finds the courage to embark on the therapy journey. Whether your issue is small or considerable, your choice to help yourself through psychotherapy is commended!

At the beginning of the therapy relationship it is important to talk to your therapist about your expectations. You may have some realistic as well as unrealistic views of the therapy experience. Here is a list of possible unrealistic expectations that you may hold:

1. I expect to feel better immediately.
2. I expect to receive a check-list of things to do that will fix my problems.
3. I expect my therapist to take away most or all of my uncomfortable thoughts and feelings.
4. I expect a "cure".
5. I expect my therapist to make my spouse love me again/to make me fall back in love with my spouse.
6. I expect my therapist to fix my child.
7. I expect to heal within a precise and short amount of time.
8. I expect my therapist to take away my pain.
9. I expect my therapist to erase my bad/unpleasant memories.
10. I expect to change without experiencing feelings like pain, sadness, anger, or fear.

While I understand these may be some of your deepest hopes about therapy, they are unrealistic. If you hold onto these expectations during the therapy process you run the risk of changing nothing and worsening your current emotional state.

Here are some realistic expectations of the therapy experience:

1. I expect to bond with and trust my therapist.
2. I expect to learn about myself, both good and bad, and be able to take responsibility for myself.
3. I expect to receive emotional support as well as a voice of reason from my therapist.
4. I expect my therapist to be honest with me at all times.
5. I expect to be productive through hard work and ongoing learning.
6. I expect to be challenged and simultaneously reassured by my therapist.
7. I expect to be rewarded and praised for my hard work.
8. I expect to change at my own pace while being motivated to exceed that pace.
9. I expect to feel comforted and encouraged throughout my journey.
10. I expect to get out of it what I put into it.

As long as you put aside the unrealistic expectations and hold onto the realistic ones,

you will do just fine.

I'll Be Here To Help You